


Assassin in a skirt

by NovemberWings



Series: The Queer Avengers [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: ? - Freeform, Boys in Skirts, Bucky/ Tony if you squint really hard, Coming Out, Don't worry, Dress Up, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Genderqueer Character, Hurt/Comfort, I mean, Internalized Homophobia, Male Pronouns, No Slash, Pansexual Character, Period-Typical Homophobia, Queer Themes, Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tony and Bucky are friends now, Transgender, Transvestite, civil war happened but everything is okay now, reassuring, slash if you want
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-09
Packaged: 2019-04-18 14:26:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14215140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NovemberWings/pseuds/NovemberWings
Summary: Bucky thinks that there's something wrong with him. It's always been there. And Tony Stark is the most intelligent person he has ever known, he fixed his arm, so surely if anyone can fix his other problem it'll be Tony Stark





	1. Chapter 1

The lift doors opened with a ding allowing Bucky to step into the ever familiar workroom in the tower. He had spent a lot of time down here with Stark fixing up his arm, and now it was finally fixed, Bucky thought he might be able to ask Stark about one more problem that he had. The only difference was that he’s always had this problem and when he first got free from Hydra he thought that the problem had been washed away, but to his dismay, it was still there. He couldn’t take this anymore, he wanted to know what was wrong with him and how he could finally fix it, and Tony seemed to know everything. 

At the ding of the lift doors Tony, who was sitting on a couch snacking on some pizza, looked up placing his half eaten slice back into the grease-stained cardboard box.  
“Bucky-Boo!” He exclaimed standing up whilst wiping his grease-stained hands on his trousers, “What is it that I can do for you today?” He flashed him a grin waiting for Bucky to speak. Bucky opened his mouth but at that moment, he kind of just froze up. He didn’t know what to say. How do you even explain this?  
“Err.” He started, “You might want to sit back down.” Tony’s face twisted into a confused frown, but he did as requested as Bucky dragged a stool over to the couch. Once they were seated Bucky couldn’t bring himself to start talking leaving Tony to fill the silence.  
“So… uhh. What’s up? Is it your arm? If it is it’s not that big a deal…” Tony was hesitant, this seemed really serious and he had absolutely no idea where this was going.  
“No. It’s not… it’s not my arm. You did an amazing job at fixing that…” Tony just looked at him, reluctant to interrupt Barnes, in fear that he would never say what he’s struggling to say now. “It’s just that I have another problem that I need to you fix.” Tony slowly nodded his head to show that he was listening. “But it’s going to take some explaining.”

Bucky felt heat rising to his cheeks; he couldn’t believe he was saying this aloud. No one knew about this, not even Steve. It was too shameful.  
“That’s okay, buddy. Take as long as you need to.” Tony said gently, all of his attention now on Bucky, and Bucky didn’t know whether or not he should be grateful for that or embarrassed at all the attention.  
“Okay. So this has actually been a really long-term problem. It first started in the 1930s and I thought as I got older I would grow out of it. And I didn’t! I don’t know why. But then when I escaped from Hydra I thought that all the – all the brainwashing and torture would have fixed me, and the problem was gone for a while after I was free. But then it came back. And now it was stronger. I don’t know what to do… I don’t know what’s wrong with me, and I don’t know how I can fix it, and I don’t know who to go to. I don’t even know if you’re the right person to talk to, Steve doesn’t know. No one knows! You’re the first, and God if you don’t know how to fix me… I don’t know what’s going to happen. It might be contagious and you – you might kick me out and then I’ll be homeless, and alone and I can’t –“ As Bucky spoke, his voice sped up, until his words were almost just one noise. He started hyperventilating. He could feel himself panic, why on Earth was he telling this to Stark, the man who literally held his life in his hand. This was so stupid! Before he could let his thoughts run away from him any more Stark placed his hand on Bucky’s flesh shoulder making Bucky flinch out of shock from the physical contact, which was still relatively new to him.  
“Okay. Okay. Take a deep breath for me buddy, and hold it in. Yes. Just like that.” Tony slowly talked him down from his hyperventilation until he was breathing normally again. “Okay. No matter what this problem is I’m not, under any circumstances going to kick you out of this house for it. I’m not about to make you homeless because of a problem. We’re going to solve this, but I need you to explain exactly what this problem is. There is no judgment here.” He smiled slightly to himself, clearly amused, “This is a safe space” He said putting on a hippie-mocking voice, making Bucky smile a little. Bucky let out a final breath between pursed lips;  
“Right. I’ve always wanted to wear women’s clothes. I want to wear dresses and blouses and skirts. I sometimes want to wear makeup…” He trailed off shamefully, looking down as his clenched fists that rested on his knees. He felt his face burn with shame, still not really believing that he had said the words out loud. 

Nothing but silence filled the air for a few seconds, while Tony sat saying nothing, for once at a loss for words.  
“So… What’s the problem?” Tony asked frowning slightly. Bucky, in response, let out a soft little scoff.  
“Don’t mock me, Stark. Don’t make me say it again, I thought I could trust you to help.” He felt so foolish, why would he ever think that Stark would sympathise with him?  
“You think that you wanting to wear “ladies’” clothes is a problem? Is that what you’ve been panicking about?” Tony asked, and Bucky dared to look up and meet Tony’s eyes.  
“Yes!” He hissed, “it’s not natural. Sure I grew up in a poor area of Brooklyn and there were queers, an’ that’s fine and all but this is just another, massive step away from what’s okay.” Tony let out a slight wince and a small pained hiss.  
“Alrighty Buckster, so you can’t be using the word ‘queers’ that not reallllly okay anymore, but we live and learn,” Tony said in a rushed tone.  
“Right” He grumbled, cringing slightly, “sorry. I don’t mean to be offensive.”  
“I know, it’s cool. I just don’t want you to say it in public and get the press on our backs” Tony spoke gently, “also your “problem”” He said doing finger quotations around ‘problem’, “isn’t a problem at all. Like seriously. It’s totally fine. Some men make a living out of dressing up like women, and even if you just want to wear a dress casually that’s so fine as well, and anyone who says anything different is backwards. I think you’d look great in a dress myself.”

Bucky looked down at his hands, which clenched at Tony’s words.  
“Please don’t do that. Please don’t mock me. I just want to be fixed, Tony. Can you please just fix me.” He felt himself getting slightly choked up. Why did he have to be the wrong one? He tried so hard and now Tony was making a big joke out of it.  
“Barnes.” Tony spoke sternly, gaining Bucky’s attention, “I will not be ‘fixing’ you. There is nothing to fix because NOTHING is broken. If you want to wear women’s clothes, that is perfectly fine. There is nothing wrong with doing that. I am one of the most pansexual person you will ever meet, and androgyny is the new sexy.” Bucky’ brow furrowed, there were so many words that he didn’t understand and Tony seemed to pick up on that. “Alrighty, I think you and I are going to have to have a little talk.”

Tony sat with Bucky for about half an hour explaining all the different terminology and citing different celebrities to show that how Bucky felt was fine and completely normal.  
“So just to clarify, and this isn’t a permanent answer, remember gender is fluid and can always change. You don’t want to biologically be a woman?”  
“No…” Bucky answered slowly.  
“That’s okay, you can still wear dresses. Do you think you are a woman?”  
“No.”  
“And what pronouns do you want to use?”  
“He/him.” Bucky felt a little smile poke at his lips, this conversation was amazing, he finally felt like another weight had been taken off his shoulders.  
“How do you feel?” Tony asked carefully.  
“I feel great” he smiled through his words.


	2. Chapter 2

Buck heard a gentle knock at the door of his bedroom. He startled slightly, no one ever came to his room?  
“Come in?” He said, now questioning if there had been a knock at all.  
The door swung open revealing Tony, who rolled behind him a massive rack of colourful clothes, nothing like he owned now. Pinks, purples and blues, when the only colours his wardrobe really ever had were black, grey, white and the occasional burgundy… He looked at them wantonly. Tony made the rack stop, and he went and closed the door behind him, spinning around chauvinistically, his arms wide with a winning smile on his face.  
“A present!” He exclaimed loudly, but all Bucky do was stare, his eyes so wide it was almost comical. He only realised after a few moments that his mouth had fallen open, which he then closed, embarrassed. After about 30 seconds passing with no movement from Bucky, Tony gave a good natured huff, and started walking towards the bed that he was reclined on. He grabbed Bucky’s flesh arm and gave it a tug. “Come onnnn” He whined dragging him towards the rack. “What colour do you wanna try?” He asked putting his hands on his hips. Bucky couldn’t words, still in a state of shock, he just reached forward and touched a blue 50s skirt.  
“This one…” He said quietly, still not quite believe what was happening, but all he knew was that he was smiling and he had a soft glow in his chest that almost mirror Tony’s arc reactor.  
“Righty O then” Tony smiled as he pulled it off the rack and held it against Bucky’s waist, staring at him for a while, contemplating. He handed the skirt to Bucky and started rifling through the rack down the other end among the tops and blouses. He pulled out a short sleeved white blouse, with two little blue birds embroidered on the breast pocket. 

Tony then bent down and opened a box at the bottom of the rack and pulled out a pair of flesh coloured stockings, and a pair of dainty flat shoes.  
“Okay, so go put it on!” he said while shoving the items into Bucky’s arms and then proceeding to clap excitedly. “Go on!” He exclaimed with a smile giving Bucky a push towards his en suite.

Bucky softly closed the door behind him, and sat on the closed toilet seat, looking at the bundle of soft, colourful, clean beautiful fabrics on his floor. He stood and shrugged of his grey jogging bottoms, before reaching into the soft pile and grabbing the stockings. He straightened his leg and slid his leg into it, and God wasn’t that the best thing he had felt in years. Slowly he started layering the items of clothing. It took a while but when he had finished he felt amazing.

He dared a glance in the mirror, and what he saw took his breath away. The blouse hugged his torso in all the right places, and the sleeves perfectly framed his muscled, even his metal arm somehow looked beautiful with that ghastly star hidden from sight. On his waist sat the blue skirt, showing off his limited curves. The stockings almost made his legs look skinny and the little flat pumps were the perfect size. As he looked it the mirror, he felt his breath stolen, and he felt right. Finally right.

He walked to the door and hesitated with his hand hovering over the knob. He couldn’t help it, being tortured for years made him see the worst in people; what if this was all some elaborate scheme by Tony? What if when he opened this door there were camera crews, the avengers… Steve? What if there were people to drag him away to a mental asylum?

Bucky blinked hard, shaking his head slightly. This was crazy, why would Tony go to all that effort? ‘For killing his parents’ a little voice in his head whispered back. He closed his eyes harder, try to push the voice away. No this would be fine. Tony wasn’t that cruel, he had fixed his arm. He hadn’t judged him, hadn’t laughed at him. Before he could think anything different he twisted the knob and stepped out.

Tony was sitting on his bed cross-legged, fiddling with his phone, playing some sort of game. Bucky quickly glanced around the room, assassin instincts kicking in, but there were no camera crews, no mental health doctors, no Steve. Only Tony. 

When Tony heard the door open he glanced up to look at Bucky. His face stretched into a grin, but not a maniacal grin, a kind smile.  
“Ghaaaaaaa! You look so good!” He exclaimed smiling ear to ear. “Good choice, I mean the blue is slightly reflecting on your metal arm and it looks gorgeous, and if I do say so myself, that blouse goes perfectly.” He spoke through a small chuckle. “Come ‘ere.” He said beckoning Bucky before hitting the bed next to him. Bucky slowly sat down, and Tony moved behind him and he felt hands pulling out the bobble holding his bun on the top of his head. “I think that a fish-tail plait would look better than a messy bun.” And Bucky could feel hands starting to twist his hair.  
“How to hell do you know how to plait hair, Stark?” He asked laughing gently, enjoying the feeling of hands in his hair, feeling truly pampered.   
“A. I think we’re probably past the point of you still calling me Stark. B. I’ve had girlfriends, I’ve looked after little kids. Also it’s fun.”

They sat in silence while Tony concentrated on getting this plait really tight, gently biting his slightly protruding tongue in concentration.   
“Tony?” Bucky started, knowing this next bit was going to be awkward, but it had to be done.  
“Ye, buddy?” Tony’s fingers didn’t cease the patterned movements of his hands.  
“I really want to say thank you for this, it’s so kind.”  
“You’re welcome. Don’t worry about it. If there’s something else you want to talk about or if there’s something else that you want to do with this, then just ask, and I’ll see what I can do.”  
“Um, also.” Bucky paused, feeling his heart beating a little faster in his chest. “I’m sorry about what I did to your parents. To your mum.” He felt Tony’s hands still and stop twisting. He heard Tony take a breath before their hands continued their twisting.  
“It’s okay. I mean… It’s not okay what happened. None of the things that happened the were okay. My parent’s death wasn’t okay. And… What happened to you wasn’t okay. You’re not a bad man, Bucky, I know you’re not. And when I found out, in terrible circumstances I might add,” he gave a dry chuckle, and Bucky cringed in turn, “none of which is your fault, I reacted on emotion. I mean I’d just seen my mum die. I was rash. But basically what I’m trying to say is that I forgive you. I know you didn’t want to and you didn’t consent to anything. There are no hard feelings here Buck. None at all” Bucky could feel Tony tying the bobble to the bottom of his plait, holding it in place.

Bucky shifted around on the bed, and pulled Tony into a hug, he felt Tony stiffen and wondered if he should let go, before Tony relaxed and returned the hug.  
“Thank you, Tony. This means to much.” Tony gently tapped his back.  
“Hey. Don’t worry about it.”

And Bucky had never felt more beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to lie, I don't know how I feel about this, but here it is. I'm not sure what direction I was going in when I started this, but it was apparently, this direction.  
> Thanks for reading. xxx

**Author's Note:**

> Alrighty guysssss that's chapter 1 and chapter 2 should be up shortly, and it'll be a little more hands on I guess. I love writing transgender avengers so much, this is so much fun


End file.
